Monday, June 4, 2007

When People Don't RSVP....

As a wedding planner - one of my pet PEEVES is when folks don't bother to respond to the invitation a couple has sent for their event. I mean - let's be for real, shall we??

If someone takes the time and effort to think about YOU and put YOU on their guest list, and pay good money for YOU to attend their wedding so YOU can eat, drink and be merry - don't YOU think that YOU can take a minute out of your busy schedule to simply check off "yes" or "no" on the pretty card, place it back in the envelope (that does have a stamp on it) and drop it in the mail, by the deadline specified? Is it that hard? Is it really rocket science to complete this small, but highly important task?

Okay - I know we are all busy, but weddings are not cheap. The bride and groom are exerting much effort into carefully crafting a group of guests that they wish to share this day with. Along with that "crafting", comes the financial portion - which generally revolves around the reception. Speaking as the planner - I NEED to know who's coming, and who's not. Because in order for me to make it pretty - there are certain factors where numbers come into play. And since the per-person cost is averaging around $70 minimum (in the Baltimore area), the bride and groom need to know so they can govern themselves and their checkbooks accordingly.

To all of you who do the right thing and send back your responses in the allotted time period - let me say "Thank You!!".

But, for those of you who think that the couple will somehow "magically" know that you plan on attending, just because they "know" you...think again -they are not psychic mind readers who can conjure up your thought processes. And - there are some folks out there who think that a phone call to the bride or groom's (or parent's) voice mail on the morning of the wedding is a sufficient response. Newsflash - it ain't!!!!!!

So when you show up at the reception and your name is not on the "list", don't get upset. And please, don't beat up (or try to) myself or my staff because you are not listed. See - that's why you send back that little card which comes in the you can be accounted for! Being rude or impolite to me will get you absolutely nowhere..actually, no - that's wrong. For 99% of my clients, they have given me authority to only seat and accomodate those persons whose names reside on the guest list...the rest of you, well - that's a "no can do". So...being rude to me will, indeed, actually get you "somewhere"..outside of the door looking in.

And please understand this - I'm really a nice person. I just don't like seeing my couples being slammed and sideswiped by inconsiderate people. I'm protective of my brides and grooms - and they know that. This is their special day - which they've carefully crafted to be memorable. Folks who just decide to "show up"...are not a part of the vision.

Okay....I'm off my soapbox - for now.


Liene Stevens said...

good points, Linnyette!

also, write your name on the RSVP card when you reply. you were not the only person invited to the wedding and the bride and groom are not going to fingerprint it to see who sent it in.

Jennifer Johnson said...

Right On the Money! It absolutely drives me batty when people "assume" that they are accounted for.....and don't get me started on the last minute AM phone calls! Thanks for saying what we've ALL been wanting to say out loud! :)

SJB Weddings & Events said...

Unfortunately, people think it’s their right to be invited to someone’s nuptials and feel that whether they RSVP or not their plate will still be there! Guess what? It’s not. People need to understand it is an honor to share that event with the couple. They should definitely treat it as such.