Friday, January 7, 2011

I AM????????

This year - I have decided to go ahead and let my "real voice" speak to all of you.  If you've ever met me in person, you'll notice that I am very down-to-earth, I don't do fantasy, I call things the way I see them, I'm quick with a humorous quip and I'm always smiling.  That's my authentic self - "straight shot/no chaser"  so since the whole idea behind this blog was to allow me the opportunity to give my own "musings" on how I see things regarding the industry, I figure I might as well go full throttle.

With that being said, in 2011 you're going to see a lot more "commentary" - I believe that speaking your mind is the best way to encourage intelligent, potent dialogue with your peers and those around you.  Let me be the first to say that I LOVE WEDDINGS.  I love the magic that surrounds them and the fact that it is one of life's "milestone moments".  I love engaging with brides and grooms, carefully discovering what makes their love "tick", then taking that revelation and creating a celebration that wonderfully showcases it to the world around them.  On the other hand..it is what it is.  I refuse to sit here and write about how "fabulous" everything is when the reality is simple.  This stuff is hard work.  I don't care how much Dupioni silk you throw on it...in order to have a successful celebration, you gotta do the process and do it well.  That goes for the couple getting hitched AND the people "behind the scenes" who make it happen.

The title of today's post, "I AM??" harkens to my observation process, which is always in warp mode.  I make my living by watching life happen around me, so over the years - this particular question has always fascinated me as I look at those around me in the industry.  What I am about to say in the next few paragraphs is going to evoke a couple of different reactions from those who read it.  You're either: A) Gonna LOVE every syllable and say "PREACH"!  or  B) You are going to think I have lost my mind.  For me, it doesn't matter.  It's the truth - and on many, many occasions..hearing the facts as they really are can be stinging, to say the least.  I see it as an opportunity to absorb, learn and move forward towards being better....

I AM a creative person.  For me, being the wedding planner has been one of the BEST outlets to showcase how my mind works and the sheer wonder of watching my thoughts play out into action.  I think in terms of color, shape, light, shadow, logistics, numbers - in short, I meld the creative process with the hard reality of thinking to mold someone's vision into an EXPERIENCE.  Over the years, all of that creativity and rational thinking have led to other "talents" which I've been able to grow and define.  They are all symbiotic to my main role and I'm grateful for the opportunity to have discovered and  honed those skills.

Here's the "rub" - I really believe that as individuals, we are all destined to do a series of "things".  But there will be ONE trait, one talent, one skill, that will stand out and shine above the rest.  That "component" is our calling, it is the area where we will excel the most.  It will be the talent that appears to be effortless, we don't even have to think about how we do it...it just gets done.  Now, here's where I drop the shoe off of the other foot..wait for it...wait for it.....

YOU CANNOT DO EVERYTHING.    I'll repeat that:  YOU CANNOT DO EVERYTHING.   In the wedding industry, the saying "jack of all trades, master of none" is so evident.   For some odd reason, people are thinking that they can take on a myriad of functions and do them all well.  Well, guess what?  You can't.  There - I said it.  Somebody had to.   Let's get real - you can't be the wedding planner/florist/caterer/limousine service/dj/stationer....all rolled into one being or entity.  All of those capacities require separate skill sets and their relevance needs to be taken into consideration.  There are only 24 hours in a day and most of us are struggling to get by on just those, so it's simply amazing to me when I see situations like these emerge. 

As the wedding planner, I really think that people somehow feel my job is easy.  It's NOT.  Trust me.  And because I make it seem "effortless", they think that it can be added on to whatever they already do (hence my multi-task description in the previous paragraph) and it will generate more money/business for them.  As Ed Lover would say, "C'mon SON!!"  Pardon my slip into the vernacular - but it ain't gonna happen. At some point, something is going to suffer - you can't do 50 million things well.  And with the "suffering" comes a reduction in standards, a loss of creativity and you're nothing more than a hamster on a wheel.  You're running...but going absolutely nowhere.

Want to be successful in this industry?  Know who you ARE.  Understand your strengths AND weaknesses, then make the most of them.  Can you bake like nobody's business?  Great - be a baker!!  Does your food make people just smile for days on end?  Catering is your thing!  When you spin those tunes or ripple your fingers across a keyboard, does it make people want to get up and dance?  You, my friend, are the entertainer.  Bottom line is this:  It's time for people to start being the best at what they are and STOP being greedy.  I know multiple streams of revenue are always key to staying in the black, but when you do too much, your "painting" will be a scribbled, jumbled mess instead of the beautiful art it should be.....

**drops the mic and exits stage left**

17 comments:

Anonymous said...

Well said.

Wedded Luxe said...

Another great post! Love the new format as well. Keep stirring things up!

Southern Charm Events said...

Bravo!

Terri said...

I could not have said that better myself...and people will believe it MORE coming from an industry veteran.

Great Post, especially the "C'mon SON!" I love your authenticity.

Oh, and PREACH!!!!

Sarah @ Hip Ink said...

Preach sister! Keep being who you are and tellin' it like it is :)

MEBA said...

Very well said!!! I love it and everything that you said is true!

J Marie Events said...

Thank you for this post. I had this conversation with a DJ/Photographer/Videographer/Florist.

Tracy Dapp said...

..insert me standing up clapping...well said! Thanks for your truly remarkable wisdom!

"For You" Event Consulting Services, LLC said...

Very well said!!!!! Keep on PREACHING!!!!

Daisy Pagan said...

Your blog came right on time, Diva. My region is going through a real "clique" and I refuse to join. I know who I am and I know what I do best. For all of those unsuspecting brides that are buying into; they were printed in xyz so they must be great - I beg to differ... that vendor just so happened to pay their dues to that clique. I'm disturbed at the direction that our industry is taking in South Central PA. My philosophy will continue to be the same... I'm true to myself.

Lisa Michelle said...

Amen! Amen!

Anonymous said...

am loving this that's how you keep it real

Pajama said...

Top article!

Stacey Strickler said...

...And this is why we love you. Great post and so timely!

NubianLockedPrincess said...

Well said! I have been planning my wedding since August. I will be 50 when I wed in sept. I decided to plan it to see if I really wanted to ditch my nursing job to pursue my dream as a wedding planner. The job is no joke and I `am a DYIer too. By march, everything will be complete; favors, invites, centerpieces. The venue, limo, music, photographer secured! I learned to take a deep breath and take time out! I do think I need to hire someone for the day before and the day of, to enjoy my wedding! If you know someone in NYC or the hudson Valley, NY, please give me a holla!

I have been a fan of yours for quite sometime! Continue to do you!

Blessings!


P.S. I decided to take a online class at a local college.

TMichelle said...

One word....PREACH!!

Lei Lei said...

I love this! I have watch you on tv and just imagined you saying all of this! It puts it in prespective!!