Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Requiem For A Wedding - The Real Housewives Of Atlanta: Planning

First up in my "composition": THE PLANNING.  Or lack thereof.  Let's have some "real talk" - shall we?

I am a wedding planner.  A professional one who prides herself on the skill set I possess.  One said "skill" is the fine art of actually pulling together the framework, nuts, bolts and all of the other "pieces" needed to make a wedding celebration gorgeous AND efficiently successful.  In watching the episodes over the season, Cynthia said that she had a wedding planner.  She also said she had a "stylist" on board to make sure the "look" of the wedding was fabulous.  *crickets*.  {side eye}.

Wedding planners are tasked with the job of doing the HARD work - in concert with our clients, we make sure that mailings are on time, vendors are in place, fittings are done, MARRIAGE LICENSES obtained and given to the correct parties BEFORE the wedding...you know, stuff like that.  We also in many cases, create a budget and help our clients stick to it.  So if there are looming financial issues that may threaten the overall success of the event, we can be on top of things and offer creative, sound solutions.  Now...understand that television can "show" a lot of things...usually crafted to err on the side of drama versus real life.  But I'm here to tell you - producers can only EDIT what you GIVE them.  In other words, if there's "shiggety" {yes- one of my favorite colloquialisms to use!} is afoot - they're gonna catch it and film it for all of the world to see!  And that's exactly what happened here.

A wedding planner (independent - not the caterer) and a stylist are two separate and distinct individuals who can work together, but do not perform the same JOB.  I kept asking myself as the season unfolded - where is the wedding planner??  For those of us who make this our profession, we were shaking our heads, simply because we knew daggone well that much of what we saw would NOT happen on our watch.  No sir...and no ma'am!!!   And perhaps that is why a lot of the "technical difficulties" occurred in the manner they were shown..because there were "too many cooks in the kitchen" or as my Nana would say, "All chiefs - no Indians".

The wedding planner is the head honcho, the general, the commander of the "troops".  If Cynthia had hired an independent planning professional, one whose sole task was to orchestrate and carefully craft that shindig from start to finish - I can assure you that a lot of that foolery we witnessed would not have happened.  This is WHY you hire a planner.  You hire a planner so that you won't have childish chicken scratch plastered to the walls of your kitchen on your wedding day.  You hire a planner so that when your budget goes BUST, they can help you formulate a Plan B or even guide you through the postponement process. You hire a planner so that you are NOT getting a final fitting on your gown hours before you walk down the aisle.  You hire a planner to make sure that everyone has their attire and are not considering a run to Target for bridemaid's dresses.  In short - that's what we do.  We put out fires and keep an eye out for other smoldering embers so your day doesn't go up in flames.

Her team of "planners" were not on the same page - that was painfully evident.  I'll say this much - watching Cynthia & Peter's wedding unfold made me so appreciative of my colleagues in this business AND the couples who entrust their special day to us.  You cannot place a value on peace of mind, knowing that everything will go as you planned and crazy "ish {'ish is another one of my fave vernacular terms} won't pop off.  As we say in social media land - I was "SMH" {shaking my head} during the whole episode.  And judging from all of the commentary I saw on Facebook and Twitter - I wasn't the only one.  The pros who are in the trenches every day know what a trainwreck looks like....it was a sad commentary to watch this event jump the track............

photo credit: Weekly Life & Style Magazine


Nicole Scott- said...

Well said. I ready for some more!

Nicole Scott-Tate said...

Well said. I'm ready for more!

A Tisket...A Basket, LLC said...

Good stuff, Linnyette! That was real talk. Unfortunate that at that level she had to do sooo much on her wedding day.

Crystal Senter Brown said...

This is great! I love your blog. I hope you don't mind me sharing some of your posts on my website at www.thepoeticjustice.com :)

calli @ wedding favors said...

Well, this is for real. This post would really made someone think.. Getting married really needs a tedious planning plus enough bucks on your account. well, that's how it is.

www.kimkingsmithevents.com said...

This was really interesting. I did a wedding presentation for $10k with 150 guests. It was fun and in fact one girl decided to do it. It worked, except that she increased her guest count. Increased guest count means increased $$$. Thanks for this article. It was fun to see and get your perspective. Best wishes!
Kim King Smith Events

Events To Suit You, LLC said...

So many people called and made comments about that beautiful wedding. Until I read your words, I honestly thought that I was crazy or in the wrong business. I thought, "this is a dream wedding?" My 17 years of experience agrees TOTALLY with you. It was a train wreck that you could not look away from. No rings? No flowers, no runner, no license, no sense! It was all Champagne Dreams on Beer-Back money (as my Mom would say). Thanks, Diva, for assuring me that I wasn't crazy after all.

Free Dumas-Senior Director
Events To Suit You, LLC