That's what your wedding is about. You and your beloved should be celebrating this milestone moment with those people in your life who mean the most. Simply put - a wedding is about "celebration - not obligation".
As a planner, I hear it all of the time. Guest lists that are crazy out of control because couples feel as if they MUST invite everyone in the known galaxy....the 4th cousin twice removed, the passenger who sits next to you on the commuter train, the lady down the street from your grandma who used to make cookies when you were small, the ladies from your aunt's Flower Circle at church who pinched your cheeks when you were 5 and attending Sunday School, the girl who's wedding you were in (but in actuality, you REALLY don't want her as a part of your party)...oh, this list goes on.
Wanna save money? Get off of the bus - ring the bell and tell the driver "the next stop is mine". In plain terms, rein it in and start to clearly articulate who can make the "cut". I get it - everyone thinks they are important enought to warrant an invite to your shindig. Unless your name is Jay-Z, Diddy, Trump, Gates, Buffet (throw in your favorite millionaire), it costs $$$$ to have a wedding. Let's be real here - you know you have a budget and you know you have to live after the "I Do's" are said. Make life easy on you (and your wallet) - take a closer look at those names on the spreadsheet. Have the "conversation" with your fiance' and be honest - if you don't know the names on the list....reconsider sending that invitation.
You should be able to mingle at your reception and seriously know every single face that's in the place. Period. A wedding is about the joining of hearts, families and friends - it's special. No one should ever make you feel OBLIGATED to include a guest that you don't know. This is your wedding, your party and you have the right to extend that special honor to attend to the people who really matter. This isn't a "free for all" or a "house party". It's the day you become Mr. & Mrs., and from my perspective -that means a lot.
At the end of the day - I want you to be able to look back and remember all of the smiling faces that saw you begin this amazing journey. Those should be faces that you chose to celebrate with you...not because you felt you HAD to invite them. There's a distinct difference between choice and obligation. Make sure you know which one is important on this day.......
4 comments:
WOW!!! Serious Food for thought..
Very well spoken. You should seriously consider writing a book on the very subject you know so well. Your advice probably has helped several people and if you have written a book before, you should write another one. I find your advice helpful and I am sure other planners, brides & grooms, and other industry personnel will to.
Very well said. So many peopke don't realize that cutting the list is the easiest way to save money and stay within a budget. 10 extra people isn't just 10 meals, it's an extra table, an extra centerpiece, extra chairs, etc.
I know I am a little late, reading and responding, but please publish this post!!! There are so many couples who believe they have to invite everyone.....it is just not necessary.
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