I AM????????

This year - I have decided to go ahead and let my "real voice" speak to all of you.  If you've ever met me in person, you'll notice that I am very down-to-earth, I don't do fantasy, I call things the way I see them, I'm quick with a humorous quip and I'm always smiling.  That's my authentic self - "straight shot/no chaser"  so since the whole idea behind this blog was to allow me the opportunity to give my own "musings" on how I see things regarding the industry, I figure I might as well go full throttle.

With that being said, in 2011 you're going to see a lot more "commentary" - I believe that speaking your mind is the best way to encourage intelligent, potent dialogue with your peers and those around you.  Let me be the first to say that I LOVE WEDDINGS.  I love the magic that surrounds them and the fact that it is one of life's "milestone moments".  I love engaging with brides and grooms, carefully discovering what makes their love "tick", then taking that revelation and creating a celebration that wonderfully showcases it to the world around them.  On the other hand..it is what it is.  I refuse to sit here and write about how "fabulous" everything is when the reality is simple.  This stuff is hard work.  I don't care how much Dupioni silk you throw on it...in order to have a successful celebration, you gotta do the process and do it well.  That goes for the couple getting hitched AND the people "behind the scenes" who make it happen.

The title of today's post, "I AM??" harkens to my observation process, which is always in warp mode.  I make my living by watching life happen around me, so over the years - this particular question has always fascinated me as I look at those around me in the industry.  What I am about to say in the next few paragraphs is going to evoke a couple of different reactions from those who read it.  You're either: A) Gonna LOVE every syllable and say "PREACH"!  or  B) You are going to think I have lost my mind.  For me, it doesn't matter.  It's the truth - and on many, many occasions..hearing the facts as they really are can be stinging, to say the least.  I see it as an opportunity to absorb, learn and move forward towards being better....

I AM a creative person.  For me, being the wedding planner has been one of the BEST outlets to showcase how my mind works and the sheer wonder of watching my thoughts play out into action.  I think in terms of color, shape, light, shadow, logistics, numbers - in short, I meld the creative process with the hard reality of thinking to mold someone's vision into an EXPERIENCE.  Over the years, all of that creativity and rational thinking have led to other "talents" which I've been able to grow and define.  They are all symbiotic to my main role and I'm grateful for the opportunity to have discovered and  honed those skills.

Here's the "rub" - I really believe that as individuals, we are all destined to do a series of "things".  But there will be ONE trait, one talent, one skill, that will stand out and shine above the rest.  That "component" is our calling, it is the area where we will excel the most.  It will be the talent that appears to be effortless, we don't even have to think about how we do it...it just gets done.  Now, here's where I drop the shoe off of the other foot..wait for it...wait for it.....

YOU CANNOT DO EVERYTHING.    I'll repeat that:  YOU CANNOT DO EVERYTHING.   In the wedding industry, the saying "jack of all trades, master of none" is so evident.   For some odd reason, people are thinking that they can take on a myriad of functions and do them all well.  Well, guess what?  You can't.  There - I said it.  Somebody had to.   Let's get real - you can't be the wedding planner/florist/caterer/limousine service/dj/stationer....all rolled into one being or entity.  All of those capacities require separate skill sets and their relevance needs to be taken into consideration.  There are only 24 hours in a day and most of us are struggling to get by on just those, so it's simply amazing to me when I see situations like these emerge. 

As the wedding planner, I really think that people somehow feel my job is easy.  It's NOT.  Trust me.  And because I make it seem "effortless", they think that it can be added on to whatever they already do (hence my multi-task description in the previous paragraph) and it will generate more money/business for them.  As Ed Lover would say, "C'mon SON!!"  Pardon my slip into the vernacular - but it ain't gonna happen. At some point, something is going to suffer - you can't do 50 million things well.  And with the "suffering" comes a reduction in standards, a loss of creativity and you're nothing more than a hamster on a wheel.  You're running...but going absolutely nowhere.

Want to be successful in this industry?  Know who you ARE.  Understand your strengths AND weaknesses, then make the most of them.  Can you bake like nobody's business?  Great - be a baker!!  Does your food make people just smile for days on end?  Catering is your thing!  When you spin those tunes or ripple your fingers across a keyboard, does it make people want to get up and dance?  You, my friend, are the entertainer.  Bottom line is this:  It's time for people to start being the best at what they are and STOP being greedy.  I know multiple streams of revenue are always key to staying in the black, but when you do too much, your "painting" will be a scribbled, jumbled mess instead of the beautiful art it should be.....

**drops the mic and exits stage left**

Why I Cost So "MUCH"...

Simple title. Complex issue. It's a question I get asked over and over and over again - my response is generally more internal than external. See, wedding planners are are different cup of chicken soup that other industry providers. The services we provide are on another level and at their core, are the REASON someone's dreams and visions can come to stunningly, logistical life. Notice I did use the words "stunning" {for all of the loveliness and BLING BOOM you want} and "logistical", {because there is a method to all of the madness}.

For me, I can tell you without blinking one of these fabulous eyelash extensions of mine WHY my prices are not $500 for over 200 hours worth of work. Now...doesn't just hearing that equation say something? Not to mention almost 20 years of full-fledged experience in the industry, book author, television personality and so on...yep, all of those things ring up to be a pretty extensive work resume and assurance to you, the client, that I'm not somebody who got married last Saturday, thought the whole thing was FABULOUS and hung my shingle out when I returned from my honeymoon. And yes - there are plenty of people in the industry who are doing just that.

I'm a professional. I know what I'm doing. Actually, I know what everyone associated with your wedding is doing AND I make it my business to make sure that we are all on the same page. I'm the good cop/bad cop, I'm the arbiter of style, I'm the accountant and sometimes, I'm the shoulder you cry on when stuff just blew the hell up. I'm the first one in...and the last one out. I hold hands, I wipe tears, I make sure you and your new hubby (or wife) have some quality time together away from the hustle and bustle of it all, when everybody thinks you belong to them. In short, I'm the chica who makes the magic happen and ensures you have the wonderful memories for a lifetime to come.

So don't get price confused with ability. If you are looking to solely hire a planning professional by the dollar signs alone...you are sadly, mistakenly, going down the wrong path. This is your wedding...it's not like television, where I can tell the director "cut - let's do that again". It's a one time shot....and it's gotta be right the first time. If the proverbial dollar signs are clouding your vision, look at it this way {and this is a perfect segue into another hot topic we'll talk about!} - consider what your wedding is really about. Don't get blinded by all the hype and wonder you see in magazines, on blogs, websites and television. Truth of the matter is: WEDDINGS COST MONEY. And no matter what your budget is, you need to spend wisely. Why not bring the one person on board who can make sure that happens...so you can wake up the next morning and not be in the poorhouse, rifling through your wedding envelopes, hoping you can "make enough back" to cover normal expenses post-nuptial shindig? Think about it.

In the meantime, while you're thinking (and I really hope you are!), check out this amazingly insightful article from a dear colleague and friend of mine, Shayna Walker Weddle of Williamsburg Wedding Design. She breaks it down FOR REAL in dollars and cents why a wedding planning PROFESSIONAL costs more than $500. Between my musings and her number crunching, it should make things perfectly clear................

The "I DO Brunch" For Wedding Planners

The "I DO BRUNCH" is a networking event for wedding planners and coordinators that will offer an unprecedented chance to discuss in a open environment, the many challenges professional planners face in today's wedding industry. Beautiful decor, lively entertainment and great giveaways have been carefully orchestrated with some of the region's finest companies to make this a one-of-a-kind experience!

Held at the historic Savage Mill Manor in Maryland, this unique, fresh approach to serious professional networking promises to be a wonderful start to Spring! Please join our gracious hosts, Putting On The Ritz Caterers, as they showcase a marvelous feast of sumptuous cuisine and libations that will be one of the many highlights of this special gathering.

As wedding planners, we rarely have the opportunity to sit back and enjoy an event since we are always hard at work! The "I DO Brunch" is your chance to be catered to, appreciated and have a good time! We look forward to having you meet, greet and familiarize yourself with other professional planners in the Maryland/D.C./Northern Virginia area and to share the common bonds we all have in this hectic industry.

Because of the intimate nature of the venue and this event, seating is limited and on a first-come, first served basis. No tickets will be sold at the event and the final date for ticket purchase is March 21, 2009.

I look forward to see all you there!